Naked, Flawed and Beautiful

I do not send out friend requests often. But there is this particular person who caught my eye and I clicked on the rectangular green button on his Facebook profile. Now, for me to do that meant that this person was really impressive; it was not a cute profile picture or popularity. Still, when he immediately accepted and messaged me, I became all pretentious, almost rude.

“Do you always message people who send you friend requests to say ‘thank you’? I asked with a sassy smiley. “No, I just wanted to start the conversation with you. Do we know each other?” he asked. “[…] Idk. Am I the one who added you?” I retorted. Now, I’ve always had a little of attitude, I have never been into sugar-coating things but this sassiness of mine hid some kind of insecurity. I did not want to tell him straightaway that he’d impressed me. I was afraid to be truthful. To be… vulnerable.

And this is so weird, I thought to myself. Lately, I’ve been working on putting my shield down. To just be out there. To be who I am. And I found that it was okay. It was okay to be interviewed for the post of a web content writer and journalist and to say that I have social anxiety, that I sometimes find it hard to interact with people. That wasn’t what google had taught me about job interviews. Google had asked me to look confident, to only focus on my strengths. I did not. And it was okay. It was okay when, after I got that job, I sometimes had moments of panic, moments during which I would get into my shell. Yes my boss saw my hand shaking when I interviewed a person for the first time and it was okay. The other day a client we write advertorials for mentioned being a little more careful when talking to me because she knows I might get anxious. She did not mean it in a bad way; she knows how I am, she gets it, it’s no big deal (as long as I write good articles for them) and she tries to help. What a relief!

What a relief to be out there and letting people see me. And the thing with anxiety is that once you just act and let go of the ‘what if’, it becomes so much easier. We’re all fighting little battles every day, why make our burdens even heavier with pretension? If you put down the armor, if you do not even fight who will defeat you? I learnt to strip away my pretension. Are you nervous? “Yes”, I reply. ‘Fake it till you make it’ might work for others, not for me. I opt for truthfulness. With myself. With others. It is hard to put away the armor, to strip away the pretense. It is hard to be naked. They see it all. They see the beautiful skin but they also see the bruises. But that is you. It is not about valuing the flaws, about complaining about them or be a victim because of them. But it isn’t about hating them either. They are your flaws; you are imperfect; it is okay.

If I can do it in a job interview and in my everyday life why can I tell a guy that he impressed me? It is trivial but it matters. Go out there, be yourself. Get naked, show your flaws, show your bruises. Free; you’ll feel free. And fearless. Do it for the big things, do it for the trivial things. Let go of the politically correct. Do not waste time to think of something impressive to say. Just say the truth. Just say what you feel. Don’t put an armor around yourself, don’t put an armor around your feelings. Undo the corset of pretense. Breathe. Don’t seek to impress. Just be real. And you might be surprised. Others might strip too and you will see that they are as bruised, as flawed as you. Naked, flawed and beautiful. Now will you please excuse me, I need to go message a guy and tell him that yes, I did send him a friend request, that I do admire the way he stands up for causes and strives for his passion.

Written by Luckshmee Jeawon 🙂 

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Top Best Quotes From Harvey Specter that Will Motivate You

For Gabriel Macht…

 

I have to admit something..

Harvey is My Man.. and, will always be

If you don’t know Harvey – you just lost 80% of your life.

You CANNOT not know Harvey. He’s that badass freaking awesome lawyer who works for Pearson Specter Litt in the most exciting city on earth ~ New York.

When confronted with shit from life – Say “What Would Harvey Do”  

“Now when I got here, I dominated. They thought I worked 100 hours a day. Now, no matter what time I get in, nobody questions my ability to get the job done. Get it through your head. First impressions last. You start behind the eight ball, you’ll never get in front.”

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“What are your choices when someone holds a gun to your head? You do what they say or they shoot you, right? Wrong! You take the gun. You pull out a bigger gun or you call their bluff or you do one of another 146 other things.”

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“Ever loved someone so much, you would do anything for them? Yeah, well make that someone yourself and do whatever the hell you want.”

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“That’s the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big.”

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“Don’t play the Case. Play the Man”

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“Sometimes good guys gotta do bad things to make the bad guys pay.”

 

Harvey can be a real motivator if you know how & when to apply his words.

And, then…. there’s Donna…
but,that’s for another blog post :’)

#Suits #Harvey #Specter

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They said, I am Weird & Stupid. But, am I really?

They told me I was weird, proud and every other word used to describe bizarre…

What was happening to me?

Is this what those big men called “growing”?
Whatever.. It is a strange feeling, but peaceful one inside.

I lost friends. The circle is small now. Very small.
I feel drawn to mature people. I love hearing motivational speaker.
I heard that if you wanna grow up, the path to this is lonely, hard.

I talk to the universe..a lot… I feel closer to the universe.. I get “SIGNS”.. People who meditate will understand what am talking about.
I am more calm and grateful. I have developed something for every night before I sleep:
“What are you grateful for today, Neha?”

And, that practice forces my brain to think and see things differently and thus, I now have something to be grateful for every single day.

And, even when things get rough, it’s as if the universe has my back.
Like last night, this week has been bad; like moody bad and yesterday, I was racking my brain to think what was I grateful for? I got the , “I’m grateful to be alive only.”
But, just at that moment, I checked my Instagram notifications &

Andrea Navedo (Xiomara in Jane the Virgin) had liked one of the pictures I had posted about the Flash!!!!

You don’t believe me? See for yourself:

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But, that’s not the only awesome thing that has happened.
Who would have thought that Todd Carey would follow & tweet me?
Who would have thought that Neha’s blog would get more than 110 followers, with 100 views per day?
Who would have thought that I would host Kindle Best Selling Authors’ interviews and be featured in Scriggler & Niume?
Who would have thought my ebook “7 keys to happiness” would get more than 50 views?

But, that’s not achievements.. that’s stupidity, they said

They regarded me as being weird..very weird.. 
I could no longer stand hearing people gossiping about others.
I remember, everyone had made a group and they were gossiping. About everyone. That what most people do. That’s suppose to be “normal” in this society I live.
But, I couldn’t stand that.
Being in that group, I felt like someone locked me in a box forever. I felt uneasy. Very uncomfortable. For they were the people I have been seeing since my birth.
But, I could no longer be with them.

So, I had a choice – To say No to this behavior or say yes and be accepted in the group.
Saying no would mean being alone… I guess, this is the reason why most people don’t get out of their comfort zone, for fear of ending up alone and not being accepted by everyone.

But, I said no & left. Knowing what would happened when I would be the only one who is not in the group.

“What is wrong with her – She’s very weird – or maybe, just rude. Bizarre -…”

They talked about me. They are still talking about me.

But, I don’t fit in. I just don’t fit in now.

What was happening to me? What changed?

But, I am happier now… 

I no longer feel the need to change myself in order to be accepted. I am my best friend.
I no longer fear loneliness.  My “me-time” has become the best time of the day!

But, they told me I was stupid when I rejected a job.. That I would never achieve anything in life.. They said, I was imbecile. 

I just wanted to do the job that I love. Because, doing something that I love would be call passion.
I didn’t want to end up like almost everyone who hate Mondays & love Fridays.
I didn’t want to be that person who lived only on the weekends.
No, I didn’t want to be that person who dies at 25 and isn’t buried until 75.

But, then they said that everybody has to settle in life. You have to take whatever you get. This is life. It’s called compromise and those who don’t settle never achieve quickly. 

But, how could I settle for less than I deserve when I know that I deserve the best in life? And , not just me. Everybody. Everyone deserve the best.
But, if you settle, you don’t get the best. Then, you have no right to be ask the universe why your life sucks, why your job is such a pain in the ass or why your relationship is so bad. You choose to settle right?
So, why complain now? Why complain?

But, Hey! What do I know? I’m just the weirdo of the society…

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